I still cry blood
from the catacomb;
the grave of my womb.
The infertile
branches of life gnarled.
A cruel joke;
the most potent poke
not enough to stir
the cries and laughter of my DNA.
Silent.
The hormones screaming
from the continual
twisting of the knife,
lest I forget choices made
the huge price paid
at too young an age.
Still invisible.
Occupying
the vast, unseen future
in which I now stand,
the unstoppable band
that keeps marching forward.
Streets lined with well wishers
who will never look me in the eye
scared to occupy
an orgasm that lacks promise.
The reality of hit-and-miss.
Turned away at the door
by a pregnant pause.
Unable to stomach
the pride,
the applause
of a Mother-to-be’s belt.
Not available in my size,
the un-won prize
of wearing my own shape.
Moulded and adjusted
over the years,
to stem the tears
of what is… what is?
Yet the river still flows
unabated by biology
a student of embryology
unaware that it is
nothing,
more,
than a cruel joke…
oh my goodness Sarah, thank you for sharing this, I feel moved to tears. You are an incredible author/poet, never stop writing.
Darling Jo. Thank you for your beautiful comment. I hope to see you soon and share a bottle of wine with you and catch up. It has been, far, far too long. Love and Light Angel. xx